yay!!! i like this ending

YAY!!

finally, i have the ending... can not be called happy ending but not sad ending too..

wat i know now is I AM REALLY HAPPY...^0^

thanks for everything... ^^

words i wanna hear has just been said clearly... it makes me feel so relieved.. now i know wat i am in ur eyes... it`s nice though... i dunno why but after all these things happened, i feel so...alive...hahaha... over excited ?? maybe...

but wat can i do? sometimes we can not expect something as smooth as planned.. and it does not mean it will be bad..wakakkaa..

i`m happy we can talk freely ; without any doubts... humph.. this is LIFE after all..
i will enjoy every minute of these moments... ^^



``All you ever wanted to do is trust someone to always be around
You’ve had a lot of lessons to learn from
Some of them hit you so hard
And I keep believing someday you’ll see, you don’t have to be alone
There’s somebody out there, somebody somewhere to show you the tenderness you need

I wanna be there when you’re in need ``

regards,

Es7ee ^^

almost the end...

humph..

i couldn`t sleep well yesterday because something was bothering me.. up till now..



yesterday, i had a long chat with that person.. when i decided to tell or actually made a confession about wat i feel, he hit me with a story. Story that made me sad.. till now..

so...

i decide that i wanna make this feeling clear.. this matter clear.. i need to confess and tell him my feeling indirectly.. but he will get it as if it is direct confession.

he`s my best friend for all these years. for me, i consider him as my best friend.. i dunno wat he feels about me though..
i wanna know who i am in his eyes.. best friend or more.
i won`t make him feel burden.. i don`t want to... it is just for my own sake.

even if he does not like me as i do, i will STILL become his BEST FRIEND...
i`ll be there when he needs me. when he needs somebody to listen,... to play a joke with.. anything that best friend can do.. even at first it will hurt... definitely!! even now i feel hurt.
myb it sounds stupid but it is all about feeling.i can`t simply change it.

i hope he makes a right decision. i`ll support his decision... ^ ^
i still wanna know his story.. i try not to be bias on giving suggestion. as i did yesterday, i didn`t think i gave a bias suggestion.

huff,.....
i just wanna try to be honest to him and to myself. i do not force him to become my another half, i just wanna know his feeling. as i said i`m mature enough to take wat he will say.
i hope i still can become his best friend..
hope he will not feel disturbed.. he will not feel burdened... he can find a way out of all his problems..

hope it will end well..
happy ending...

this feeling makes me hurt but i like it. i experience it.. hope we can still become best friend..
i`m looking forward to know his response and answer.. hope he can give me a good answer...

hope for the best ...^^



regards,

Es7ee ^^

give up or not?

give up...
i dun like the word...
especially NOW...
but wat can i do.. could it be the best solution for now..

can i give up now? when this feeling is still here. even it`s getting deeper.. argh.. i dun regret for wat i chose quite recently.
i`m trying to show that person that i see him differently now.. but it`s useless.. he does not even realize it.. pathetic me...

i saw the words that he wrote..
then .. wat i realize is i am not the one he`s looking for. he does not need me.
i am nothing.

then... that word..give up..comes to my mind.. do i need to give up? i can not force this feeling. i tried though but it is ended up with me hurting myself.
i`m glad i tried . but it hurts. till now i still dun wanna give up.

sounds too fake? too over? maybe.. i am just feeling stressful.. just...feeling stressful..
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....




regards,


estee ^^v